Thursday, May 8, 2014

Traversing the Ford (Detroit Pt. 1)

We made it to Detroit!!!

Our first two-week visit somewhere.  It was lovely, as we had a couch and a fridge, a rental car and Comedy Central.  Detroit is still working on returning to its former glory, some places working harder than others, though.  This put Detroit at the top of Loki's list to begin world domination.  He figures if you can buy a house for $500 here, his royal chilliness could overtake them with ease.  I tried to explain the concept of street gangs, or what 8 Mile was, but it fell upon deaf ears.

We did visit this epic gem of a museum, though.  The Henry Ford!

Oh yes.  Us at the Weinermobile.  

Hot Dog!

All White Meat Footlong.

Although I was excited to see the Ford, I had no idea just how epic it was.  Not just an automobile museum, it is the most in-depth Americana museum I've seen.  From farming equipment to the evolution of power sources, and even a whole section dedicated to the culture of the 80's complete with an average kid's bedroom from that decade (which I did NOT take a picture of.  My childhood should not be a museum exhibit.  Is that a cabbage patch doll?  Where's my wrinkle cream?)

It even held some of the most impactful and game-changing pieces of history, like Abraham Lincoln's Theatre Seat (Yup, blood all over it.  Yup.  I know.)  and the Kennedy Car.  No blood on that, but what's creepy is they used the thing for years AFTER the assassination.  If I was president, I would not want to be riding around in that!

Loki did show respect to Rosa Parks, though, as her bus was there, complete with a recording of her memories of the incident and a light inside to denote which seat it was.  We sat in it.  It was surreal.

He liked the largess of the bus.  He wrote down plans to create what sounds like a Popemobile the size of a bus.  We'll see how that works out for him.

But I digress.  Loki devoured this museum.  He wanted to know everything about America's heritage, since he is 80% sure it is where he will begin his diabolical schemes and needs to know every facet of our culture to cement the outcome of his victory.  He even did a little shopping, informing me that when we overtake Detroit he will be using this chair as his throne:

And will be playing "The War of the Worlds" every Saturday night, so that when Sunday comes around, we will all be grateful for his omniscient presence and protection, and come to worship him as the god he is meant to be.

We practiced bomb drills, should the Chitauri try to come back for him and collect:

And he jotted a few notes on cell architecture.  He feels we deserve functional, yet frugal cages should we step out of line.

Car shopping or simply discussing his options regarding transportation was of course very simple, the guests of the Ford Museum were kind enough to put together this large Model T for us before arriving:*

(The gorgeous lady beside me is Gigi - Loki's Lackey-In-Training.  Ain't she a peach?)

And we were even able to create one that was just his size.

We discovered that planes used to have wicker chairs for seats that were bolted to the floor...

...Before we took in an air stunt show.

"Come one, come all, to the one and only, DEATH-DEFYING Detroit Air Show!!!"


"Silence, I am enjoying these fragile mortals play with their lives."

"Unfreeze the boy and his grandma, at least.  For Pete's sake."

"Why?  They're much quieter now.  I can hear the screams should one of these buffoons tumble to Earth."

We took in some vintage silent movies...

And with that, we bid the Ford adieu.  That would be a cool name for a car, right?  The Ford Adieu?  Classy.  Hella classy.

Since we were blessed enough to spend 2 weeks in Detroit, you will be getting TWO POSTS ON DETROIT!  Please look for Pt. 2 of our adventure, "Reaching The Zenith,"  very very soon!

*Sidenote that blows my mind - The seriously take apart that WHOLE Model T every night after closing, then have guests put it together bit by bit every morning as they reach the exhibit.  Imagine going on a school field trip, and getting to do that.  They say it takes about 30 minutes to take apart, and they take their time with the construction so several groups of guests have a chance to be involved during the day.  This is a concept of what it looks like taken apart:


Loki Soon To Be Featured On!

No comments:

Post a Comment