The Fight For The Right To Phone Sex

So today in class we were trying to make final decisions on what we were all singing as our solo pieces. Most of the others in my class are decided, with a few stragglers here and there. I, of course, was one of those few.

I feel so stupid having to defend a parody song about something as silly as working at a phone sex line. Not to mention I know I will be doing it at an open mic very, very soon. The point of the matter is that I built this song from the lyrical ground up, it is my creation and everyone in the room knows full well that it should be the song I'm doing, hands down. It brought the house down. So when it got to be my turn and people were saying how much they liked my first song, ("I'm The Only One," by Melissa Etheridge,) I had to shake my head. For a moment, I couldn't even speak.

In front of the whole class, I told the instructor that as much as I like the Etheridge and the Alanis, I would have a hard time doing them in good conscience. I feel like I'd be holding grudges against them and I adore both of those songs too much to do that to them. The song I want to do is my parody song and I did not work two weeks on it only to have it be benched due to content.

If the issue of content was going to come up during this class, they should have made it clear at the beginning of the class and not once we were in the thick of it. Also, they might have thought to not show a cabaret performer by the name of Tim Minchin, who is so raunchy that the cleanest of songs they could show us was a song he wrote about an inflatable love doll. They should have lectured on the roots and initial ambitions of cabaret performance in theory only, not in practice. All of these reasons contribute to why my fur is rubbed wrong.

Anyway, it is a very frustrating issue and I will have the verdict by tomorrow I'm told. The teacher is going to discuss it with the education heads tonight and see what they say. All I can do is what I've already done for it. If they decide to turn me down, it's their loss. I do both Etheridge and Alanis brilliantly and I will not tank doing them or something. But at this point, it's about the principle as much as it is passion.

Passion about using the word 'spunk.' I never thought I'd live to see the day.